when you start settling for anything thats not the best
thats when its over
thats when you can tie your shoe laces together
and throw them over the telephone wires
make them as far out of reach
because thats where your dreams and goal will always be

in this sport, its not about enjoying life
its about being the best
its about eating oatmeal for breakfast even though you don't like the taste
its about running an extra rep even though you have nothing left
its about staying at home recovering even though you haven't seen your friends in months

its about sacrifices
its about discipline
its about hard work

its about crawling and fighting your way through every set back

its about being the best

most battles are won not in the limelight of the game
they're not won when the crowd starts cheering
when the clock starts ticking
not even when you cross that line

most battles are won somewhere between the hours of self-inflicted pain and agony and the hardest sacrifices.
they are won when I'm training my guts out rather then going out drinking with mates.
they are won while i'm doing extra reps rather then complaining about the pain
they are won when i refuse to be defeated
rather then rolling over and giving up
victory is not achieved on one day
victory is achieved at every single session
victory is working harder then your competitors
victory is believing harder then your competitors

victory is only given to those who work harder then others believe is possible.

"Champions do not become champions when they win the event, but in the hours, weeks, months and years they spend preparing for it. The victorious performance itself is merely the demonstration of their championship character."

only winners are remembered

knock knock.

who's there?

the guy that came second.

the guy that came second who?

exactly.

if you rush today, you'll ruin tomorrow

i am a person who likes things done straight away
as fast as possible
as best as possible
all the time

but I'm beginning to realise,
this is bigger then anything i have every targeted.
i haven't made it in the past,
and why?

not because i was not good enough
not because i was not strong enough
not even because i was not courageous enough
but because i was not patient enough

Good things come to those who wait,
if you want fast results
all you'll get is short term results

this life isn't about today, or tomorrow
not even about 3 months from now.
we need to start seeing the world in terms of years
not months or days
seeing the short term
doesn't help the long term

and after all,
in terms of running
isn't what i do in 3 months time more important then what i do today.
or next week.

this is my moment
to define who i am and what really matters
to see past whats right in front of my face and to look into the distance

this is about knowing what i want
becoming who i need to be
and more importantly
believing in my ability

i will become what i know i am

never be satisfied

When you put so much of your life into one thing,
its hard to surrender when it is threatened to be taken away from you.
I've been told to surrender
to let it go
to set free the very dream I've spent the last 3 years of my life working to achieve.

here's the thing that makes life interesting,
specialists may say one thing,
and others may agree
the odds may be stacked against me,

But what the specialists don't know is that
THIS ISNT A MATH TEST
this an a completely different kind of test
one where PASSION has a funny way of trumping LOGIC

they were very clear about not offering me false hope
but tell me
when has there ever been anything
F A L S E 
about
H O P E

no one can tell me what i can and can't do
what a can and can't achieve
what my body can or can't endure

the only person who can tell me i can't is ME
&& i don't have to listen.

Start where you are, 

with what you have. 

Make something of it 

&& never be satisfied.

As long as I have a want, I have a reason for living. 
Satisfaction is death.

why are you all following me?

I choose to listen to myself

rather then listen to others

i choose to live by choice

rather then live by chance

i make changes,

not excuses

i live to be motivated,

not manipulated

i choose to excel,

not compete.

after all, you can't call it a competition,

if no one gets anywhere near you.

lay it on the line

&& What it all boils down to in the end is one question
how much do you want it?

you can't just rock up to training
you can't just get the session done
you can't just have the best intentions
you can't just wish it to happen
you can't just put one foot in front of the other
you can't just hope you're going to do okay

you have to come to training ready
you have to put every ounce of your soul into each session
you have to be willing to work
you have to MAKE IT HAPPEN
you have to push with everything you've got
you have to know, you've done enough to win

you wanna be the best?
go out and earn it!

friends
are
just
enemies
who
dont
have
enough
guts
to
kill you.

&& 5 months later

i spent so much time over the last two years training?
and why?
to make the olympics,
to make commonwealth games
to win medals
to break records

sure, for those reason.
but i spent all that time doing it because i wanted credit.
fame.
to feel that in some way my life isn't as shit as everyone else's.
to feel important.

careful what you wish for coz you just might get it.

since returning from WUG and after a couple of nationwide radio interviews,
i have had so many emails of people wanting me in the companies, as guest speakers and all sorts of other SHIT.
after all, isn't this what i wanted?
to feel important.
fuck i hate it.

guess what dick faces, i haven't made the olympics yet.
guess what dick faces, i deferred uni to focus on running and not so i have more time for your shit

so my uni, who didn't give me a cent for china but paid the way for a student to go as MANAGEMENT now want me to share my experience as guest speaker at a fancy dinner
guess what dick faces, I'm vegan, good luck catering for that.
not to mention they assumed id do it
i NEVER NOT ONCE agreed to do it
not to mention, i have to go alone

yeah good work guys, i can't function in social situations,
i have epic shyness, good luck getting me in front of people talking
stutter stutter stutter no sense

are you fucking kidding me

god, fuck, i hate this shit.

when did i become such a push over
i dont wanna be a nice person
or famous
or important

i just wanna run

so fuck off and let me do that.